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In My Father's House

 It is not the responsibility of the child to teach its parent who they are.

It is the responsibility of the parent to create an environment in which the child feels safe enough to become who they are.

To a child, only in such an environment can true freedom be experienced and real "free will" be exercised.

The parent who creates an environment in which the child feels unsafe to become who they are, where they must pretend to be something they are not in order to avoid being rejected and win the parents acceptance and approval, creates an emotional Skinner box of expectation in which the child's true self is conditioned to perform like a circus animal. 

Based on the behavioral psychologist B. F. Skinner, a Skinner box is an apparatus for studying instrumental conditioning in animals (typically rats or pigeons) in which the animal is isolated and provided with a lever or switch which it learns to use to obtain a reward, such as a food pellet, or to avoid a punishment, such as an electric shock.

The second environment is the one cultivated by religion, with the food pellet being approval and the electric shock being rejection, both of which you receive for whether you "believe" in Catholicism or not. 

The first environment is the one cultivated by love, where no one judges you based on whether you believe in the right "brands" of beliefs.

In my family, home was a Skinner box.



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