The Bible explains that God created the world in six days, and on the seventh day he rested (although it never explained why an all powerful being would need to "rest" ).
On the eighth day, God decided to write a book about it all.
And on the ninth, he decided to create 6000 vastly different languages, of which only 200 are actually written languages, the many of which have wildly varied grammatical structures and words that are without synonymous equal, and vested his sacred church - a church that has just as hard a time ferreting out child molesters among its ranks as the public school system - with being able to make sure everyone gets it right, forever!
And on the tenth day, God said, " There! Now they shouldn't have any problem understanding that."
Then Jesus asked, "But what if they do?"
To which God replied, "Then I suppose I will cast them into a lake of fire for all eternity for being so stupid, unless they grovel and thank me so much for not doing so before hand, that I decide to bring them to heaven, where they can continue to do the same thing for all eternity."
And then God grinned as He leaned over toward Jesus - who was just a boy at the time and sitting on the floor at the left hand of his father - and said:
"That is, unless you want to take their place."
"That is, unless you want to take their place."
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